Genital Warts and Other Dating Mishaps

I came across this interesting statistics last night: there are an estimated 26 million Americans who are infected with the HPV virus (which, amongst other things, is responsible for genital warts). Given it's prevalence it should be clear warning for men and women alike to be extra careful when engaging in sexual relationships with new people.

Older folks may think that it's a symptom of the younger set with their so-called "loose ways". In reality, seniors should take heed too: There has been a marked rise in sexually transmitted diseases among seniors, in part, no thanks to drugs like Viagra.

So what is there to be done about it?

1. If you suspect you have genital warts - be aware that it is painfully contagious. It is spread via skin to skin contact. People have long memories, especially of those who gave them something as a lasting as the clap. Stay at home. Do something else. Take a cold shower.

2. Be socially responsible. Consider dating with people who have similar STDs. You can locate them via websites such as Positively Singles. It is not only a site for the HIV positive. HPV positive is as good a reason.

3. Consider creams. I'm not making particular recommendations here, but it suffices to say they are available and can be reasonably inexpensive, and not too painful to apply.

4. Laser surgery removal of warts is safe. However, it does not eradicate the Human Papilloma Virus (HPV) from the host. (i.e. you still can infect other people).

5. Avoid oral sex. The genital wart virus has been linked to throat cancer. A recent report indicates that presence of the HPV increases one's risk of contracting throat cancer EIGHT FOLD. That is something to crow about.

6. Having an active STD is not the end of social life. Just be prepared with some decent excuses so that you don't have to take your date home. For example, "It's my parents anniversary tonight, and I want to set aside an hour to have a chat with them over the phone", or "It's my turn handing out blankets for the homeless tonight". Sounds better than "I've got the claps baby".

7. What about condoms? The current advice is condoms may reduce the chances of spreading it to another person. However, there is protection only when the infected region is covered. My advice is: "Stay home guys and girls, it is not a pretty sight"

For more articles from Mark Gardner, dating extraordinare on free cures for genital warts and other dating mishaps, or simply to find out about home made cures for genital warts simply visit his web site.

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When Sex Became "Dirty"

Once upon a time sex was enjoyed without shame, as a gift of God, Goddess, the Great Spirit an act of joy, of devotion, something perfectly natural and wholly divine all at the same time. Once upon a time the goddesses were venerated as the embodiment of love, passion, and sex, which were considered holy when performed in reverence for and in service of the female divinity.

But the mindset of patriarchy killed off the Goddess more than five thousand years ago. She was constrained to submission at worst, or virginal purity and celibacy at best; her divinity denied. With that, the idea of sexuality as spirituality, as something inherently divine, was eradicated for all women young and old. Indeed, for all men as well! Sexuality was severed from spirituality and became its extreme opposite; sex was dirty, primitive, and instinctual (and feminine in nature), while spirituality was pure and clean and transcendent (and masculine in nature).

In the West, however, it was only from our Bible onwards that sexuality became a sin, the means by which the devil could tempt mankind into damnation, a shameful necessity of physical gratification that was obscene and dirty. Only from our Bible onwards, were women considered inherently sinful and destined for eternal punishment.

Even before Eve bit that apple, there was poor, feisty Lilith (born initially as one with Adam "male and female created He them" says the first Biblical reference), who, according to legend, preferred to have sex on top. Lilith represents lunar consciousness (waxing and waning, death and rebirth), sexuality, body, and intuitive wisdom all of which patriarchy degraded and denied. She got a terribly bad press.

Previously, the Goddess had ruled the mysteries of sexuality, birth, life, and death. Now the patriarchal God took control of life and death, and split procreation and motherhood from sexuality and "magic and mystery". Lilith refused to submit and flew off in a rage. Until recent decades, she has been universally demonized as seductive, witch, outcast the enraged, avenging goddess, wife of Satan.

Solar was split from lunar; psyche from soma or physical, corresponding to a general disassociation from the body. Mind and body, spirit and body, soul and body were split entities, and unequal. The body was inferior, an unfortunate necessity together with its most basic of functions, sex; and it was associated with the feminine. (I once read an old text that described women as "bags of filth". The males' organs of excretion were not referred to.)

Male and female were unequal; spirit and nature were unequal. Man headed the chain of command after God. As women, and as a culture, we have paid dearly for this division. The misogyny of the patriarchy affected all cultures in the last 2000 years, one way or another.

The fierce, sexual, independent-spirited wise dark goddess aspect of Lilith was replaced by submissive Eve, who was yet blamed for the whole messy business anyway. She was the sinful one, secondary to Adam, and cursed forever to give birth in pain. (Medieval midwives were sinning when they alleviated the pain of childbirth.)

As long as Eve is sinful and physical matter corrupt in any way whatsoever, our sexuality is compromised and our liberation incomplete. This split must be healed.

I am proposing that sexuality and spirituality are aspects of the same thing; that the split between psyche and soma (the physical) is resolved in the energetic unity of a higher order. "We have lost contact with what unites them," says Alexander Lowen in The Spirituality of the Body. Sexuality is psychosomatic and by that I mean, not that it's some kind of illness, in the more common meaning of the word, but that it overtly operates on both the physical and the psychic level.

Where science and religion are finding rapprochement in the infinite wave world of quantum physics, we find fresh metaphors for the lost unifying element. Waves of sexual sensations that emanate from the body can be visualized as cosmic, psychic energy, high-frequency vibrations that bridge us to higher consciousness.

These metaphors indicate possibilities that have profound implications generally, and more so for ageing women today.

2007 The Hanna G Ruby material.. Towards a Soulful Sexuality, a Different Menopause and a New Aging through healing your sexual self. Extracted from Sex, Age & Menopause: a baby boomers manifesto. Visit Hanna G Ruby on http://www.sexageandmenopause.com and http://blog.hannagruby.com or email hgr@sexageandmenopause.com

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